worst kind of heartbreak;

Nothing says heartbreak like playing your last college game in America. Today was the end of it all, I knew going into the game that it could be my last game, but I never figured it would legitimately be my last. I pictured placing the ball in the back of the net a thousand times, got a good nights rest, stayed hydrated, iced, did everything in my own power I could to be prepared for today’s game. We all know that one person can’t win the game. It takes a team to win, and that’s something that this years group lacked. We weren’t ever a team, we faked it, and there was always drama between two or more people. It was just not our year, too bad for us sophomores because it was pretty apparent out there that we wanted it.

We had a brilliant first half, never gave up, and had great shots against our opponent. Sadly out of the 14 on net we came up with zero goals. The opponents well they had a total of 4 shots and 1 goal. Second half I felt like we put up a fight, we didn’t fight to win we fought to stay alive. I don’t think all of us can say we played our hearts out, I know we all didn’t leave everything we had in us on the field. That is what really gets to me. When I look at the clock, I am telling myself, 45 minutes left and you get that break, 30 minutes left, 10 left leave it all on the field, I even say it to my teammates…yet it didn’t get through. I don’t know if they just aren’t mentally strong or if they just don’t give a shit. Either way, I can’t change the outcome. I’m not happy with the end result, but I am certainly not disappointed with my own performance. Yes I could have better finished my shots, but I got shots away and I gave amazing passes to my teammates. I gave it my all, and although it wasn’t enough, I can’t be upset with myself. It was a great experience playing here in the states; it allowed me to do a lot of growing up. This won’t be the last game I play but it is the last game I will be playing here in the states. It’s a saddening way to go out, but it is what it is and I can only grow from it.

Now for the nine-hour bus ride home with a team that hates themselves and hates each other…oh joy.