Procrastination; a technique I have mastered in college. I
think the fact that I get so tired helps me keep putting assignments off. I
know I have an assignment due in a week, but I also know when I get finished
with class at 5:30 and get done at the gym around 7, I will be exhausted. I
will go home, force myself to eat before passing out for another night. Lately
my procrastination has hit a whole new level. I finished my final project, it
went up in the gallery and I felt accomplished and good about the work I put in
the show. I was exhausted from all the effort I put into it in the leading
weeks. When I was done and it was one thing off my list, I kind of felt like
not working on anymore homework, like I was just done for the year. Too bad
that’s not the case and I have about 6 more assignments to get on with.
Survival mode is something narcoleptics are familiar with,
the times when either we weren’t medicated or we weren’t medicated properly. We
do everything in our will power to remain functioning; we do everything to stay
sane. I am properly medicated, I’ve got everything in order but if I don’t get
that good nights sleep survival mode is within arms reach. If I miss 3 nights
of a good nights rest, well survival mode is where I end up.
Last week I stayed up late watching a movie on Netflix, it
was fine it was the weekend and I could sleep in the next day. I got 8 hours
(weekends I usually get 10-12), woke up for practise. Sunday I hung out with a
few friends, didn’t get to bed till about 1 or 2 am. Got 7 hours sleep. Was all
right, took my supplements made it through the day but was super tired. Monday
night however I was up working on a project I had completely procrastinated,
left till the last minute. I had all the images I needed for this PowerPoint presentation
but needed to learn my facts so I could give the expected 10-15 minute speech
to the class. 11 o’clock at night I got off to a mediocre start, 11:30 a friend
called crying. Next thing you know I am driving my friend to the emergency room
and speaking to cop about domestic violence. At the end of the day, not upset
about it, just happy she is all right and her boyfriend got dealt with
appropriately. I finally got home that night at 2:30-3am. I still had to
present my project in the morning at 11:30am. I still knew next to nothing
about the facts to give that speech. I stayed up till 5:30am. Went to bed, woke
up at 9:30, caught a ride to school with my roommate and managed to work a
little more on the presentation. Worst part is that I worked so hard on the presentation
but in our class we didn’t have time to get to my presentation, I now would
have 2 more days till that class. I hate working hard on something that is due,
completing it, then finding out I could have slacked and gotten away with it! That’s
just the procrastinating mind speaking!
With all the lack of sleep, my mind was depleted I was
struggling to stay awake; I was giving in to the horrid snacking/caffeine
ritual to get by. The next day I
took a narcoleptic day and ended up skipping a class to go sleep. I didn’t even
set my alarm to wake up. Four hours later I felt refreshed enough to do my
homework then back to bed for some Netflix and a much needed nights rest. End
of the school year means more stress and a lot of projects to keep track of for
all my classes. I am extremely happy to see the end nearing!
College has taught me a lot; I’ve met a lot of people, had
new experiences and just generally became a more independent person. I never
expected college to be like this, and maybe it’s the fact that I attend a small
college, but I’ve never experienced so much drama in one year of school.
Seriously it blew my mind, we’re suppose to be adults, putting high school days
behind us, yet I found everyone to be digging for drama. My parents would laugh
at me for saying this, but I feel older than I am. I honestly feel like the
amount of things I’ve accomplished, experienced, been part of and seen should
put me at my Brothers age of 21. It seems silly, but when I put myself next to
another 18 year old, it’s rare I find them mature enough or intriguing enough
to have a somewhat serious conversation with. I also think it’s the fact that
the degree I am going for (Photography) is such a short schooling that I feel
like I’m starting a career earlier than most. It’s kind of intimidating to me,
maybe it’s the reason I am intrigued by more schooling. I think that diving
into a career at 18 or 19 when all my friends are just starting school is odd,
maybe it’s the fact that it would make me feel like more of an adult and
responsible and I don’t feel ready to stop goofing around and wasting away some
of my teenage years. We all have to grow up, but stepping out of school and
stepping into a career is a
frightening move for me. Good thing it’s only a solid 7-8 months away.
13 Days till I am home in Canada
17 Days till I start my 8 week adventure backpacking Europe
Sleep Well fellow Narcoleptics!
I'm sure you truly are more mature than other people your age. I see it a little in my daughter too. You are meeting adversity and excelling! When my daughter Cassie hears her team mates complaining, she's like "please...move over and let the narcoleptic girl show you how its done". :) Speaking of Cassie, she starts high school next year and is going through tryouts for the High School Volleyball team this week. Cross you fingers for her!
ReplyDeleteThank you both, appreciate the feedback and kind words!
ReplyDeleteGood luck to Cassie with High School, hopefully she finds it to be more fun than not! Also wishing her luck with Volley Ball try outs! Awesome to see/hear fellow narcoleptics engaging in sports!
cheers! =)