My Parents are Pretty Smart;

I know I got lucky in the world of supportive family members when it comes to Narcolepsy. I have met many narcoleptics over the years of all ages, and honestly one of the main issues and contributors to their uncontrolled narcolepsy was the lack of support they got from there loved ones. It’s a huge stress when you feel misunderstood, when you constantly have to explain yourself or simply when someone says it’s all in your head. Trust me, I’ve been told plenty of times by peers, teachers, coaches and even teammates that it is all in my head or come on you can’t be that tired… or my favorite You’re lucky you can sleep whenever. It use to drive me nuts, it use to hurt my feelings, but sometimes you have to let those things go and just deal with the ones who understand or try to understand.

Lately I’ve had a tough go of it, I couldn’t even find the time to think any of my issues through, I felt like I was 14 again…Waking up and wondering when I fell asleep, wondering how long I’ve been out, and oh @!%# what time is it; am I suppose to be somewhere?! It’s an awful feeling but it’s a feeling all narcoleptics are faced with.

I finally had a bit of a break down last night, a bit of a realization thanks to my parents. I am finished my Photography certificate, the main reason I came to school in the first place. I only came back this year to play soccer and it was my choice to take on this Business Management Certificate. It was my decision, my parents had no influence on it, and I wasn’t trying to prove anything to anyone but myself. I hate failure; I hate struggling and worse I hate asking for help. With classes this year I am uninterested, unmotivated and struggling to find the time to do all the homework requirements. My schedule is busy, my narcolepsy gets worse with stress and with the never ending homework I am having trouble staying awake long enough to enjoy any of this school year. Did I mention I came back this year for fun, for the enjoyment of one more soccer season? Yes, apparently somewhere in the past 2 months I forgot to remind myself why I am here. Thankfully during a phone call with my two wonderful parents last night they reminded me to slow down, my health comes first. I’m not going to be disappointing anyone if I don’t pass a class, I’m not going to be a failure if I don’t get this certificate that I don’t need. I need to start remembering to eat, remembering to sleep, and reminding myself that I have 2 months left and this experience is over…I need to enjoy it and be able to look back on the good times, not the time I slept through it all!

Now I am saying screw grades, screw trying to get all A’s and B’s when I can have all C’s and D’s. My future is not at risk by taking these grades; I already accomplished good grades in my passion of Photography.

Now I must get back to homework so that I can go out to a movie tonight after practice…I need to have a social life again.

Cheers!

P.s

I am glad I have the parents I do, I never feel like I can't talk to them, I am constantly supported in all that I do, and most of all I am surrounded by their love. I couldn't ask for anything more from them, so thank you Mom & Dad.